On Life Lessons

There are a few lessons that I've learned both in living my life and as a result of my accident.  If I succeed in teaching my children these lessons, I will view my parenting venture as a success:

1.  Even when you are afraid of doing something, if it is something that you really want to do or need to do, do it anyway - that is the definition of courage.

Whether this be standing on stage and performing in a ballet recital (Alli), or performing a guitar solo in front of music class (Simon), or writing and sharing everything that has happened (me). All of it can be and will be fear inducing.  That's okay.  A little fear can go a long way in teaching you what's important - especially when you face it head on.

2. There will always be someone in this world who has more than you (more stuff, more money, more happiness, more suffering, more loss) and there will always be someone in this world that has less.  It doesn't matter. What matters is what you do with what you have.

I recently read an article that a friend sent me on two of the Boston Marathon bombing victims. My first thought - WOW! What courage and determination they have.  My next thought - geesh, I'm lucky.

I have friends and family members who have experienced great joys and great sorrow.  I am happy for their happiness and sad for their sorrow.  And I am happy for my happiness and sad for my sorrow. Differing experiences allows us to share our own, perhaps helping others along the way, or at the very least, give us the ability to share a smile or a laugh.

3.  Helping others is the greatest way to help ourselves.

Here's where I'll come back to writing.  Part of the reason I'm writing is to share what support and internal determination have given me - to show others that with perseverance and by surrounding oneself with kind and loving people, one can move forward and accomplish more than he/she ever dreamed, even if it is in a totally new way.

And the other part - that's purely for me.  It helps to put thought to paper.  It is amazing to read the comments I've received and to see that I've touched people.  Me?  Really?  It's kind of fun to think that other people are interested in what I have to say.  I've  never thought of myself as anything special.  I'm just me - someone who's strong and determined to make the best of what I've been given.

4.  Be kind to others.

While I choose to be kind to others not in the hopes that it would return to me, I have, in fact, had that experience.  After my accident, I was amazed at how many people followed my story, reached out, prayed for me, etc.  I have to believe that this is because I was kind to them in some way or fashion along the way. And for all those doctors, nurses, therapists, and people I didn't know who showed me great kindness and consideration, I will continue to be kind to others in the hopes that I am somehow returning the favor or paying it forward.

5. Earn it.

I believe that the things in life worth having are more often than not,  hard to get. Whether that be something simple like a tough spin class, or recovery from an accident.  If you have to work hard for it, then it means something.  And if it means something, do everything you can to earn it.

6.  Live your best life... and survive.

I'm a survivor - not because I survived a really bad accident - I'm a survivor because my mindset allows me to be.  It doesn't really matter what happens, I'm going to figure out how to get through it the best way I can. I would love to be able to teach my kids how to be survivors. Perhaps some of that they will get from example, but some of it has to come from inside too.  I can give them the tools, they have to learn to use them.