On What I Learned from High School Field Hockey

Alli decided not to return to dance this year. Although it makes me sad that she won't continue to be a part of such a wonderful dance studio, she wanted to explore other options. So, she is taking an art class - which if you know Alli, you know that this is her true passion. Still, I feel like she should do something physical - happily she chose to try the sport I played in high school - field hockey.

Me, my junior year of high school and Alli at her first practice

                                                            

I was not a good field hockey player - I can perhaps claim being mostly competent. I didn't score for the other team or anything, but I also didn't score for my own (and I played wing position on the forward line, so it was kind of expected that I would).

I did, however, learn a tremendous amount from my time on the field hockey team.

1. There are plenty of people who are going to be better than me at things: And, this is okay. There are plenty of things that I am good at, and there will undoubtedly be things I’m not good at. But you never know what you’ll be good at if you don’t stretch your capabilities, if you don't push the edges of comfort and try something new. You could find yourself in places you only dreamed possible. If you're constantly comparing yourself to others and worried that you aren't the best, you won't be able to focus on doing your best - instead you'll be distracted by constantly looking over your shoulder.
2. With teamwork, you can accomplish so much: Great teams are those in which there is a trust amongst members that you'll work together for the best outcome - that you're all equally invested at being the best you can be. So what makes for a not-so-great team? When team members are not equally invested - the team will fall apart. I've been a member of great teams and terrible teams (my hockey team was great), and if I hadn't learned early on what a great team could accomplish, I would have settled for not-so-great on future teams.
3. It is worth it to be persistent: As mentioned, I was not a great hockey player. I didn't let that stop me though - I kept on pushing to get better. And, I did get better - I was still not great, but I was better. This lesson has helped me countless times, certainly when faced with recovery from the accident. Persistence is often the key to achievement. Few people are great at all things their first try. If we gave up the first time we were not great, we wouldn't go anywhere. Keep trying. It is worth it.
4. You can make up for lack of talent with enthusiasm. I did this with field hockey, and I've done it in many other facets of my life. I may not be the best, but if I believe I am capable, want to do something, and have fun while I try, then I end up accomplishing my goals. If I enter something with a positive attitude and don't question myself along the way, no one else is going to question me either. Enthusiasm, combined with persistence can take you anywhere you want to go. Have a will, find a way.

I may have first learned these lessons while on the Broadneck High School field hockey team, but they are indeed lessons that have been applicable throughout my life.

They are applicable in parenting and in career. My friends frequently tell me that I always seem to have all things buttoned up - I know exactly when and how everything should be done in order to achieve the best outcome. Um... maybe.

Or, maybe, I have a great team of friends and family that have my back. Maybe it doesn't matter if I'm not the best at something. Perhaps, I make up for my lack of talent with enthusiasm and persistence - managing to fool a whole bunch of people into believing I know what I'm doing. It isn't that I'm trying to fool people. Well, maybe I am... I'm trying to fool myself into believing I can do it and that I can persist (keep going) until I can. I’m not saying go out there and “fake it ‘till you make it,” - I’m saying, just because you’re not the best, doesn’t mean you can’t feel good about yourself and the contributions you bring to the team. If you have that mentality, you actually aren’t bad at all - you’re good! And good is plenty good enough!   

While I try to model these lessons for my daughter (and son) regularly, I also know that being on a field hockey team is a good way to learn them faster than by watching me model. She is my child - I don't expect her to be great, perhaps not even good... I do expect her, however, to learn immensely valuable lessons in her time on the team - lessons that can help her for a lifetime.