On Neurofatigue
By Friday last week, I was exhausted. I don't just mean physically tired. My brain was tired - or more accurately, it was just plain done.
According to an article in www.brainline.org , neurofatigue is fatigue is caused by a decrease in physiological reserve, which includes a person's physical and mental reserves. When your brain is “tapped out,” you feel tired. ... But generally, people with TBI have described fatigue as a sense of mental or physical tiredness, exhaustion, lack of energy, and/or low vitality.
This describes my experience last week perfectly - think of it as extreme burnout. This is a very real symptom, one that frustrates me to no end because it is one that I still struggle with, even six years later. I am challenged with it in two ways: first, slowing down isn't really something I do naturally - I have to be intentional about it; and second, I am generally pretty determined, so I have to be careful not to push myself too far. I have had to learn to hold back. As someone who is an all-in kind of perfectionist, this is particularly challenging. Fortunately, for the most part, I manage my time and energy levels in such a way that it doesn't impact me very often.
Last week though... whew!
Typically, only drives on either beltway or I95 or I70 are the cause neurofatigue for me. For obvious reasons, those kinds of drives are really stressful, so the time in the car (if I'm driving) is time where my anxiety is at full-tilt. It can take me a full day to recover from a drive. I did not really drive last week and although I took a long car trip, gratefully my SIL drove for us. It was best for all five of us in the car that I didn't.
Things were scheduled one on top of another - my cousin's wedding in Brooklyn, followed almost immediately after by a strategic two-day retreat for a client. Although I could have chosen to miss one or the other knowing that I would likely experience neurofatigue, in my heart, missing either wasn't really an option. So, I chose fatigue.
I've paid for it. Although I normally go to the gym six days a week, last week I did not go at all. I just couldn't. I may have had a hard time just opening my eyes in the morning. I had to listen to my body (and my brain) and take time off. I rested on Thursday and Friday more than I usually do. I made sure I had plenty of rest time on Saturday and Sunday, also. Neurofatigue is hard, I mean really, really hard. I am glad that it isn't something that I deal with often. I know that there are people recovering from TBIs that experience it almost daily and certainly earlier on, I dealt with it more. I have had to modify what I do and when, in order to prevent neurofatigue. It works for me. For some, no amount of modification really helps.
Neurofatigue doesn't just impact those of us who have had major TBIs. It can also impact those with a minor brain injury such as a concussion. And, it can last long after what the general population would see as the time needed to recover. Brains are amazing. We can recover from so much. However, brains don't always recover with the speed you wish. And, our loved ones may or may not still have symptoms many years afterward. I continue to receive kindness and compassion from my friends and family. I know I am lucky.
TBIs can function much like other invisible challenges (fibromyalgia, depression, anxiety, high-functioning autism, etc) in that if you aren't living it, you don't really know - even if you love someone who is. I encourage you to ask questions, seek to understand, and show compassion for those who could be having a hard time. And for all of us, we should listen to our bodies and brains - they really do know when enough is enough.
According to an article in www.brainline.org , neurofatigue is fatigue is caused by a decrease in physiological reserve, which includes a person's physical and mental reserves. When your brain is “tapped out,” you feel tired. ... But generally, people with TBI have described fatigue as a sense of mental or physical tiredness, exhaustion, lack of energy, and/or low vitality.
This describes my experience last week perfectly - think of it as extreme burnout. This is a very real symptom, one that frustrates me to no end because it is one that I still struggle with, even six years later. I am challenged with it in two ways: first, slowing down isn't really something I do naturally - I have to be intentional about it; and second, I am generally pretty determined, so I have to be careful not to push myself too far. I have had to learn to hold back. As someone who is an all-in kind of perfectionist, this is particularly challenging. Fortunately, for the most part, I manage my time and energy levels in such a way that it doesn't impact me very often.
Last week though... whew!
Typically, only drives on either beltway or I95 or I70 are the cause neurofatigue for me. For obvious reasons, those kinds of drives are really stressful, so the time in the car (if I'm driving) is time where my anxiety is at full-tilt. It can take me a full day to recover from a drive. I did not really drive last week and although I took a long car trip, gratefully my SIL drove for us. It was best for all five of us in the car that I didn't.
Things were scheduled one on top of another - my cousin's wedding in Brooklyn, followed almost immediately after by a strategic two-day retreat for a client. Although I could have chosen to miss one or the other knowing that I would likely experience neurofatigue, in my heart, missing either wasn't really an option. So, I chose fatigue.
I've paid for it. Although I normally go to the gym six days a week, last week I did not go at all. I just couldn't. I may have had a hard time just opening my eyes in the morning. I had to listen to my body (and my brain) and take time off. I rested on Thursday and Friday more than I usually do. I made sure I had plenty of rest time on Saturday and Sunday, also. Neurofatigue is hard, I mean really, really hard. I am glad that it isn't something that I deal with often. I know that there are people recovering from TBIs that experience it almost daily and certainly earlier on, I dealt with it more. I have had to modify what I do and when, in order to prevent neurofatigue. It works for me. For some, no amount of modification really helps.
Neurofatigue doesn't just impact those of us who have had major TBIs. It can also impact those with a minor brain injury such as a concussion. And, it can last long after what the general population would see as the time needed to recover. Brains are amazing. We can recover from so much. However, brains don't always recover with the speed you wish. And, our loved ones may or may not still have symptoms many years afterward. I continue to receive kindness and compassion from my friends and family. I know I am lucky.
TBIs can function much like other invisible challenges (fibromyalgia, depression, anxiety, high-functioning autism, etc) in that if you aren't living it, you don't really know - even if you love someone who is. I encourage you to ask questions, seek to understand, and show compassion for those who could be having a hard time. And for all of us, we should listen to our bodies and brains - they really do know when enough is enough.
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